responding to the 17 things I learned at 17
27 feels like reclaiming the parts of myself I set aside — the things I loved before embarrassment convinced me otherwise.
Case in point: Blogging
I have been journaling since I can remember, but in 2015, I shared publishing on Emotional Shawty 901. Named for my Memphis (901) roots and my then 16-year-old teen angst, it became the home for my early voice: opinion pieces, lookbooks, food reviews, and even a guest post from my high school boyfriend (which he in turn sneakily deleted after he broke up with me).
Every year, I have journaled the number of things I learned that mathed my age.
This year, I want to write to my younger self – responding directly to what 18-year-old me wrote about the 17 lessons she thought were Absolute Truth.
Much of which I still agree with!
BE YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND
17-year-old me was certainly thinking: 1e come in this world alone and we die alone, so it’s imperative to get really comfortable in your own skin while on this planet. Poetic, dark, and correct. 27-year-old me still has room for improvement in this area. Even though I am comfortable dining alone, I still wince at the idea.
TRY THINGS AT LEAST ONCE – it’s okay if you never ever want to do it again
Better to answer the what-if than to look back in agony forever.
DAIRY IS THE WORST
Lactose-intolerant propaganda was all the rage during this time. I still vibe with alternative milks, but I’m really vibing with A2 dairy right now. Alec’s ice cream has the proper, whole-dairy, straight-from-the-cow ice cream consistency without the inevitable tummy ache. I genuinely want to invest in the A2 dairy industry.
Boys will come and go, but you remain, stay true to yourself
no truer words have been said.
You never learn how to cherish someone until they’re gone.
yeah
It’s okay to form relationships with people outside of your friend group.
You are the sum of the people you spend the most time with, your friends should have diverse backrounds and experiences that is the true way to lead a full life.
Writing everynight is theraputic
Yes, but with the disclaimer of only going through old Journal entries when you have the emotional bandwidth
WHEN YOU LOOK GOOD, YOU FEEL GOOD
You can dress up Free City and Aviator Nation sweats, I stand by this.
Take time out everyday to take care of your mental health
yeah……
No matter how much you dislike your family they are the only ones truly looking out for you
In high school, I beefed hard with my entire family. At 27, I hold true the understanding that: it is all our first time on Earth. This grace has transformed all of my relationships.
Dancing once a day is good for the soul
I need to bring this back. Dance yourself clean.
PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE…in everyway posible, you may just surprise youself
I cannot think of a time in the past 27 years in which I regretted putting myself out there. Awkward as fuck, yes, and sometimes nothing came of it. Still, I have always gained either confidence or connection, and that’s an ample tradeoff for a small moment of uncomfrotability.
You are very afraid of rejection but try to be as open to it as you can
This fear now has a name: rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD). Getting diagnosed with ADHD in college gave me so much context to my emotional world. Sharing about my mental health is a challenge I want to step into this year.
ALL ADVENTOROUS WOMEN DO
okay she was obviously watching Girls season 1.
BE NICE TO EVERYONE…..espically those that are the rudest to you
Still trying to practice this to this day.
HOW YOU LOVE YOUSELF IS HOW YOU TREAT OTHERS TO LOVE YOU
This one hit harder the older I have gotten. If you accept crumbs, you will be served crumbs. I can be a big lover girl and still have self-respect. The true power comes in being fierce with your time and energy: the strongest currencies.
Life does not stop for you or anyone else no matter how much that may hurt.
Still true, but now I see the optimism in it: life is constantly moving, which means you can move to. You’re not trapped in the version of yourself someone else or your own false beliefs created for you. Every day is a chance to step out of the matrix of yourself.
I’m excited for 27 it feels less like reinventing and more like returning — to softness, to creativity, to the weird little things that used to make you feel alive before you were aware of an audience.
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